Shit My Son Says

Friday, February 4, 2011

D: "Mommy, you want this penny?"
Me: "Sure"
D: "It'll cost you 1 cent."

D: "When I close my eyes I see yellow spots."
Me: "That's because you were staring at the light."
D: "When I open them I see a fart cloud."

Daughter: His real name is Scotty.
Daniel: And his fake name is Mr. Potatohead

My daughter: "What's a pestle?"
Daniel: "A puppy's ears."

"Great, I'm getting squished by Ashley and Mommy's BOOB!"

"Teach the cat to fly!"

"I don't want to make my bed. I've been doing that for YEARS."